are stupid. Just look at curling.
on earth does one have the time to come up with
such nonsense. I beg to
differ about your views upon Americans. My family
has fought for this
country, thus I have become rather found of the
United States. Your plan is
oddly reminiscent of Pearl Harbor, of how the
Japanese lodged a kamikazi
mission against the United States. I'm afraid
that the US doesn't fall for
the same thing twice. You have forgotten about
exchanging messages between
cannot use dog sleds, it's far to slow. This rules
messengers too. So basically, you have three choices.
Phone, which can be
easily tapped, morose code, which is also easily
tapped, and the Internet,
quite possibly your best bet, but also can be
easily tapped (hey, if a
fifteen year old can do it, so can we). Now, these
loop holes shan't help
you to rule the world. You also conveniently overlooked
that fact that the
US and Canada are allies.
If you were to attack the United States, the UN
(and the United States of course) would most likely,
forgive my language, kick you ass. The US alone
has enough nuclear weapons to bomb every major
city on the face of the Earth twenty times over.
well I'd personally be surprised if you could
do it once. Second of all, Canada has no resources,
everything in Canada, such as your gasoline and
iron, come from other countries, most of whom
are allied with the United States. Without their
help (for they most likely would not like to go
up against the US), your country would have a
severe handicap, much like the South in the Civil
War. However, as you shall be conquering a very
vast area, you will have a major disadvantage
there. The US has a much higher population than
you should rethink your plans.
meet the CIOO Covert Intelligence Operatives Organization
You people make me sick we will conquer the world
not you feeble minded REDS!
Head of the CIOO
all my fellow Americans reading this site, have
fear! First, they will have to cross the border,
which will cost them a
week's salary in canadian dollars. If by some
chance they actually
gather up enough of their "loonies"
(by the way, any country that calls
some of it's money a "loony" says it
all) to get over here, us
Detroiter's have a plan. The Canadians don't know
this, but we are
secretly populating Ft. Wayne on the Detroit River
with our homeless who
have been promised a rock of crack, and their
own 9 mm to shoot any
Canadian on sight! We have more artillery on Woodward
Ave. than does
your whole country. Relax fellow Americans! They
will never make it
through our gauntlet!!
From the front lines in Michigan
has designated 47 Biosphere Reserves in the United
States covering 50 million acres. In order to
designate sites and spheres under either of these
UNESCO programs, the United States must agree
to manage these lands according to international
dictates and objectives.
UN/UNESCO types have made no secret of their goals.
Their next step is their Wildlands Project, a
plan to designate one half of the United States
as "protected areas or areas where special
measures need to be taken to conserve biological
don't need or want any UN/UNESCO bureaucrats telling
us how to "protect" our own land. We
can jolly well handle our own protection.
I Guess You Will Be Next !!!!
I'm an american who was sworn into air cadets
guys really did think this through but really
it wont work because
americans are exposed to this....and stuff so
they would understand whats
going on before you could get the plan off the
ground...but you know if you
take out george bush THEN america would be pretty
much stupid because we rely
on a stupid man to make us not feel so stupid...so
send in some bombers blow
up to white house and invade right away...and
the world will fall to your
feet because like they'd love you for taking out
Canada take over the world?
Beat Europe first!
plans for world domination are futile. Not only
do Canadians lack the
military and economic strength to pull this off
but they also are without the
population big enough to overrun a country like
America. Also, even if you
did pull this off your inevitable downfall would
be being a totalitarian
state and over expansion, your military and leaders
can't be everywhere at
once. Even if you had leaders everywhere you still
need strong leaders to
hold it all together. Anyway the A-Bomb would
take care of most of America's
problems. Heck, with all the weaknesses you are
displaying its a wonder
America hasn't taken over Canada yet. So I guess
thats it. I'd like to get
some sort of feedback on this due to the fact
that I a 14 year old kid has
already dismantled your plans i a couple of minutes.
for the laugh,
The Canadian generals
From: Dutch International Unity Movement HQ
would hereby like to officially inform you that
your CWD-movement is
interfering with our plot to take over the world.
I therefore kindly grant you
three days to surrender peacefully and quietly.
If you fail to comply within
the set time limit I will be forced to regard
Canada and the CDW-movement as
hostile. Refusal to cooperate will result in a
heavy cheese-bombardment of all
strategic, civilian and commercial locations in
However since we do seem to have a common enemy,
the vile and satanic United
States of America, we are willing to allow you
to become one of our allies in
the holy and just war against these uncultured
barbarians. In exchange for
your assistance we will be willing to offer you
the privilege of keeping your
beloved maple leaf in your future flag, the red,
white and blue.
I would just like to inform you Canadians that
there are still patriotic Americans that hold
the United States in high regard. Some of us still
get goosebumps during the playing of the Star
Spangled Banner, the reading of the Declaration
of Independence, and the smell of apple pie. We
would give our lives in defense of our great country.
As for your plan, it would never work. Most of
your population lives within 100 miles of the
US/Canadian border, and would thus be prone to
an effective counterattack.
Loyal Patriotic American
people are mere amateurs. You know nothing of
world domination. What you
need is a real plan! You canadians are only what
you are because of us great
Englishmen. You should not be taking over the
world in the name of Canada,
but in the name of Great Britain and the Queen.
I ask you this, who is on
the back of your coins, just as she is ours? Exactly,
your plan is foolish. I have been developing many
plans, and soon
plan to publish them. My plan is guarenteed to
succeed. What you need is
someone like me. You need to learn. You have much
to learn. But, I can teach
you. Following my plan will take us to the top.
We can rule the world
together in the name of the Queen, and myself,
an e-mail to email@example.com
love the web site, but I am confused...most of
the site seems to be well
edited, and you seem to be articulate and literate
(for Canadians, that is!)
all the spelling errors?
mean, you keep spelling "humor" as "humour",
and "honor" as
"honour"...perhaps your computers need
a Spell Check (or is that "cheque"?)
Kisses and Tequila (a/k/a "Mexican Crown
Dallas, TX, USA (a/k/a "South Canada")
free speech, but this is a sick idea....
you cazy? Freaks!
I'm a pure American who believes that I should
take over the world. As long as I can make sure
every Canuck bites it,we can be free. Long live
America! You are a bunch of smegging twonks who
would lose a battle of wits with a stuffed iguana!
You'll be yellin "eh" in the pits of the underworld
when we are done with you. We shall bury you,
day Canada grasps the reins of world domination,
is the day Americans grasp the meaning of "irony"
can destroy your civilization easily...all we
have to do is drop our educational system on you
and irradiate your cities with our television
#1 if...all the rest of the countries in the world
were to disappear. Maybe I am misinformed, What
does Canada do or produce? Canada is not known
for anything but hockey and mediocre comedians.
Canada weakly broke away from France (gee that
must of been tough)and has been divided ever since.
You country cannot decide on a common language
- nor do you require that everyone learns both
French and English, which would be the best solution.
is not known to have really done anything, Canada
has never been a world power. There is only one
world power left... UNITED STATES OF AMERICA:
We lead economically, militarily and with the
freedoms that are available to it's citizens.
Sure - we have our share of problems, but that
comes with the high level of freedom and capitalism.
Canada being a Semi-socialist country will never
-ever become anything. Did Canada even participate
in any war ever? Not that participating in a war
is a sign of a great country - but I am wondering
if Canada can stand up for its beliefs or do you
just "protest" to the UN? What do you do?
far as I can gather you pretty much leech off
of the USA's abilities and resources - similar
to Mexico but Canada isn't quite as broke or as
corrupt as Mexico. Canada is just the Northern
Suburbs of the United States. If your country
were to complete disappear... it would have ZERO
effect on any and all aspects of the world. And
why is it that so many of your citizens come to
the USA for jobs? And the famous actors and comedians
move to the USA?
Please tell me what is "Great" or even remotely
good about Canada. I really want to know.
, you think that you can take over my country
, eh ? Well I have news for you !!! I've come
up with my own plan , to remove the threat of
the canadian scum ... I will Marry one of your
women ( I must say that I think Canadian women
are much more lovely)(I've also been told by canadian
women that canadian men are stupid vile creatures..)
I will breed the nationalism out of them ( now
multiply this a million fold ) and we WIN !!
Have you radicalist Canadians
ever heard of the concept of subterfuge? I mean,
if you are totally outclassed, or if you prefer
simply outnumbered by your opponents, At least
try to rally together all of the 3rd world countries
into your submission first. The U.S. is not likely
to fall to outside forces, and do you know why?
Because opposition brings them together to serve
a common cause. Insurrection is always nice.
Another logical idea would be
to establish something similiar to a net around
the U.S., for instance, request that Mexico and
the rest of Latin America refuse to deal with
the U.S. until it forfeits some of its wealth
that you claim you are on the verge of obtaining
with this imaginary military you head. Force them
into economical homage. Although only about 20%
of the U.S's exports go to Canada, if they are
suddenly forced to ship and fly their cargo, just
think what would happen. The world's energy resources
are dwindling, and im sure complete chaos would
I possess other theories for
bringing the world to its knees, and as of this
date you have done nothing except babble on about
these plans of yours. You
probably don't even have real authority in your
country. The French Canadians in Quebec are no
doubt single handedly capable of causing a civil
war in your utopian-like country, and you would
be powerless to stop them.
You have not either been proven
worthy of my true intelligence, nor shown any
indication that you have any of the latter, and
I am debating right now the necessity of your
existence. Maybe, with the passage of time, somethiing
interesting maybe bestow its grace to this most
unsanctified website, maybe. Until then consider
me your enemy, for I could not dare think of declaring
allegiance, nor neutrality for that matter, in
the light of individuals as ill-prepared, ignorant,
and undedicated as yourselves.
Let's be logical here. America
has over nine times as many people as you do...
did you ever realize that?! If you attempt to
take over the world with your satellite, go ahead.
There's going to be 300 million Americans waiting
to kill the Canadian species and will most likely
America The Beautifull
Canadian Domination Eh?
I'm not so sure you cannuks can pull it off. I
was under the impression that you needed a military
to invade a nation. Those fruits on horses don't
count either! The Mounties are of no concern to
us. I don't even think that Canadians are willing
to fight for Canada, their home and native land.
Even the majority of Cannuks don't like Canada.
How else would you explain the fact that the number
one immigrant into the US are Canadians. honestly,
if parts of your nation are seriously considering
defecting, how do you ever plan on winning. The
US had that problem some years ago. We were able
to resolve it in the end. Canadians work out their
problems by going to a better country, and who
can blame them. And of your plan to subdue Americans
with Canadian Beer. Ha! Canadian Beer Sucks. Nothing
beats a Texas Brewed Red Dog or Miller Light any
day. Surely I can't blame you for such a mistake.
Being raised in Canada shelters you from reality.
Her it is though. Canadians are weak. Their more
likely to feed you than fight you! That kind of
hospitality is what makes Canada a friend of the
US. When it turns hostile however, that's when
it is time for the US to smack your crazy nation
around. After all we practically own you. Everyone
knows that Canada is like the 52nd state (after
Puerto Rico). If you ask me Canadians just have
an inferiority complex. You are ours to do with
whatever we want! Live in your delusion for as
long as you like, your fantasy will never come
GOD BLESS AMERICA!
The Wielder of Truth and Distributor of Justice
The American Nationalist
Sworn enemy of Canada
Loyal American Citizen
Michael James Ongstad
okay canada will never take over
the world. it's impossible! The USA reigns supreme!
nothing can stop us! NOTHING!!! hahaha! oh, and
on your website you say MST3K is like on your
side. but I happen to have MST3K the Movie. They
watch the movie This Island Earth. but at one
point when a spaceship approaches earth you see
a cheesey pisture of the world with North America
facing the screen. The Crow says "Just the way
we left it, with the USA in charge!!!" that cleary
states that da USA is da real deal boys! dont
mess wit america or we'll come over mess you and
your mounties up!
laterz - concerned individual
okay. OK. okay. now, now let me
get this stright. YOU-canada, think you can stop
US-the United States of America, in war. canada
can't ever beat the USA in any form of anything
ever possible anywhere. where you get the idea
that you can even come close to doing anything
remotely threatening is beyond me and any other
sane person. youre like just a dumber, uglier,
colder, dumber(again), weaker, dumber(yet again),
add-on to the US. we have lost like no major wars
or even small wars against Germany, Britain, USSR,
which are powerful countries and you think a weak,
dumb semi-country like yourself can stop us. hahaha!
are you smoking something. cause then your ideas
are excusable, but otherwise you all belong in
special clinics. i mean Los Angeles could destroy
your entire country by itself. what are you gonna
do send mounties against us. Dudley Do Right?
"What's this is aboot eh?" ya! even the simpons
make fun of you. "I move here Canada and they
think I'm slow, eh???" hahaha. priceless. you
can not stop us! We will inherit the earth! So
do yourself a favor and surrender now, cause the
US is running out of patience with your dumb,
Sincerely, The entire American public!
GIVE IN TO AMERICA!!!!! YOU WILL NEVER SUCCEED!!!!!!!
I have often suspected that Canada
was pulling strings of world government. Therefore,
I believe your threats of world domination are
a ruse to lull the rest of us into thinking that
your still in your planning stages. We are not
fooled! So, I must notify you that my coalition
of Americans, Sri Lankans and a few self-proclaimed
displaced Canadians plan to strike deep into Canada
to end your tyranny. Thereafter, the world will
see Canadians as they truly are: NOT NICE!
PS: I am also convinced that Canadians live among
us in the USA. They seemed to have mastered the
ability to morph into forms that resemble Americans
so much that it is impossible for the untrained
eye (or should I say, nose) to tell the difference.
They can only be identified by the faint smell
of Swiss Chalet sauce emanating from their skin.
CANADA COULD NEVER RULE THE WORLD!
WHAT DOES CANADA HAVE TO OFFER THE WORLD, NOTHING!
Hello, Allow me to introduce myself.
I am Stephen Bronn, soon be be glorious leader
of the planet earth. I find your page interesting.
Your plan has some faults, or maybe your are sly
and have left out key components but in either
case your attempt shall fail. I am sorry but you
must understand that I alone must rule the world
and although I am from Canada I am also power
hungry and ruthless. I will exalt Canada above
all other countries but at the same time I am
also going to become the leader of the newly unified
world. I have a web page dedicated to spreading
my word and if you wish to visit it you may. Just
respond to my e-mail and I shall send you the
url. I wish you luck in the future, your site
is excellent, the layout is elegant, your web
design skills may be unmatched.
However, I shall rule all for it is my destiny.
Now if you will excuse me, I must bid you adieu,
there are plans to be foiled and worlds to control.
Your soon to be leader
The only good thing about Canada
is your drinking age.
If it weren't for Canada, Alaska
wouldn't have anything to hold on to and it would
sink into the Pacific.
A Concerned American.
the folly of world domination
by two lowly women!
We have stumbled on to your meager attempt at
world domination and are very peeved with this
finding. We (Emperor BOB and Overlord Bingo) are
disturbed that this kind of action was not run
thru our channels. Any future attempts of world
domination may constitute a breach of domination
protocal and may subject your cause to immediate
fanny slapping and subsequent imprisonment in
our baby gated kitchen. The required uniform will
be as follows: a diamond tiara, kiss the cook
apron, bright red lipstick and nails, a kiss the
cook apron 2 sizes to small. If you would like
this enticing but humiliating punishment keep
on the the route you are going.
We need to schedual a future world leaders summit
between our two factions. There will be a one
million dollar donation from our comrades in Canada.(small
unmarked American bills) and naked pics. You are
welcome in advance for our time in this matter.
The We Are Better Than YOU World Domiation Faction
PS What is your bedtime?
This is the funniest thing in
the world. The way you guys make Canada seem all
powerful and cool! It's almost convincing! But
this is a country known only for bacon and excessive
use of the word "eh." How could you guys possibly
make yourselves beleive that you could overtake
America? All in all, I do love the site.
Keep up the good work you hosers.
Before I thought you were all
fools, then I noticed Bush and Gore. MY GOD MAN!
Were all screwed, you gota help us.
You guys have to be the stupidest
morons this side of the world. You dumb fucks-all
you know how to do is play hockey and kiss England's
ass. You should all seriously burn in hell. If
i was to piss on your army all by myself my urine
would probably burn out 85% of your army. I love
your website-the second i saw it-I had this really
bad case of diarrhea-odd.
you people are clearly in denial-
Documentaries such as "canadian bacon" and "the
southpark movie" (with the heroic theme "canada
sucks") have shown clearly that nothing of value
lies in canada; (note: i do not capitalize canada
on purpose, it is not worthy). The actions of
the mackenzie brothers in strange brew mimics
the lazy uselessness of the entire canadian population.
THERE IS NO NEED FOR THE WORDS 'hoser' and 'eh?'
to be in a humans vocabulary. Worthless are the
canadians, a waste of a good mountain such as
Whistler, B.C.. I'm proud that you have wasted
your time (typical of canada) on such a useless
website. You think you're funny, but even scheming
about the invasion of the United States Of America
is blasphemous, and we should pave your entire
country devoid of the 'maple leaf" that you hockey
morons prize so highly. Weak Beer, the false promise
of good fishing, and the pathetic nature of the
mountie as an enforcer are all reasons for the
canadians to be shipped straight south, not to
the U.S. but to hell.
By the Way, the 0 is in reference
to your I.Q.
What in the hell is a Timbit?
We find your pathetic attempt of world domination
humorous, but also sad. To think that the country
that spawned the Kids in the Hall (who I do find
funny, might I add...only because they realize
Canada sucks), Mike Myers, and milk in a bag would
stoop to such a low is incredible. We realize
that you are only a small militant group, but
we think that the entire country of Canada is
also in on this plan of yours, and therefore have
lost all of what little respect we had for the
Lemming Country. We are reporting this site to
the proper authorities of the world, and we hope
to see the entire country of Canada blown up,
or something. However, before you all die a horrible,
horrible death which hopefully involves sea bass
of some sort, we bid you luck in your quest. You
will never defeat the Daddy Spackle Pants Master
Daddy Spackle Pants
(www.mp3.com/daddyspacklepants and www.geocities.com/daddyspacklepants)
(P.S. - The day is mine!)
Canada will never take over the
USA! Canada Sucks, and its army does too.
Well, first off, Lord High Executioner
of the Holy Synod (simplified, leader of The Proletariat),
and Minister of All Affairs Related to Guns And
Bombs and Stuff (Shmee), must protest your efforst
to out-Communist us. The Proletariat are the true
guardians of enlightenment. We will destroy the
corrupt leaders who oil the gears of The Machine
with the blood of the workers and use the bourgeouis
fascist pigs that grow fat on their profits [read:
YOU] as stepping stones in this endeavor. In short,
we shall rule the world! Unless of course we get
too drunk and pass out, then we'll just have to
do it after the hangover wears off. Should you
choose to simply surrender to our superior intellect,
please write to this address and relinquish control
of all funds related to your pathetic Canadian
World Domination campaign [stolen from the lives
of the workers]. These funds will be transferred
to The Proletariat's World Control Fund for use
in future campaigns.
The Others [The Proletariat]
PS...die you damned Frenchies! Fucking Frog bastards!
PPS...President Van Buren says: "The blood of
the bourgeouisie will oil the gears of our war
PPPS...President Kennedy says: "We aren't just
going to kick their Frog asses. We're going to
kick their Frog ass, call their mommies, and BRAG!"
Get back in the kitchen and make
some pie, bitches!
Better be careful...
....the USA has the most highly-armed
homeless population in the civilized world. Good
Pete (Oh, and LOL.)
I actually am quite worried about
your impending invasion of America. We are far
too busy purchasing your hockey teams and moving
them to our Southern states to actually pay attention
to any invading Canadian forces.
- Mark (from the front lines
Listen, I have no problem with
your infantile fantasies about world domination.
I even have some nice suggestions on my homepage
But seriously, if you are going to attempt such
a feat, at least do us all a favor and wipe out
the British and French first...wait a second,
what nationality are Canadians originally?
you punks would not know how to
fight, and the only reason you faggots took part
in world war 2, (the war AMERICA WON) is because
the brirs made you. And one of you ice eaters
please tell me how many men are in the canadian
army, ooopps I forgot canada does not have one.
Okay, first off, your site is
pretty amusing. It makes me giggle like a schoolgirl.
I'd just like to clarify a few things for you.
Canada IS NOT a country! It's a suburb of Minnesota.
And while our military is becoming stronger by
feeding on big slabs of beef and scrapple, your
mounties are eating... ketchup flavored potato
ps. Where were the Canadian teams
in the Stanley Cup this year? Oh, that's right,
the cup is in JERSEY!!!!!
To whom it may concern,
Well, well it has been approximately one year
since the Showstoppa's last communication with
your wretched organization and yet he is still
indubitably sickened by this completely insane
idea of Canadien domination. It is pish-posh,
hogwash, poppycock, pure malarchy, etc, etc. I
believe my last letter to your rag tag bunch of
houligans completely disproved any possible arguments
your feeble minds could have conjured up in defense
of your country's superiority over ours so I shall
not feel the need to be redundant. However I believe
I have found a remedy for your animosity towards
those of the American persuasion. The Showstoppa
believes that the two generals of this organization
simply require contact with a strong American
penis- be it large or small (or simply a DC powered
device of some sort) whichever you prefer. I shall
be monitoring your activities. Tootles.
Your hero and role model, the
Ok im sick of these thered world
counters always talking shit about the good old
US. And holy shit if Canada would even try to
take over America we wouldent even need guns to
woomp there mother fuckin ass's....
Ha ha ha. Very funny. This IS
a joke, isn't it? I hope you guys aren't planning
to dominate the world. What are you trying to
do, bring the US back under British rule? Start
World War Three? Spark a cold war between the
United States and Canada?
If any of you Canucks try to
invade this country, I can assure you there will
be serious consequences. Our Armed Forces will
crush your troops like a bug.
Good luck. I hope you like starting
World War Three...
Dear Evil Generals,
YOU SICK BASTARDS!!! What do you think you're
doing!?! I am a big fan of Celine Dion and Alanis
Morrisette, and I happen to like Jim Carrey a
little, too...and you're calling THEM traitors???
Well I have news for you. YOU, Jenny and Claire,
are the traitors here! You betray the United Nations,
you betray the British Commonwealth, you start
World War Three for your own selfish gains! Look
at yourselves! Don't you think it would be better
if you stayed where you are instead of attempting
to take control of peoples who don't like foreigners
taking over their lives? I mean, come on now,
the people of India HATED the British who took
over their country, so isn't it obvious that they
would hate Canadian rule as well? And I happen
to also be a big fan of Elvis Stojko, so why is
he involved in your sick little plot? I also watch
"Jeopardy", too....are you using this as a cover-up
so you two can take over the world? I'm sorry,
but the peoples of the world will put up a fight
before you can take them down....
It's nice for suburbs of the good ol' USofA to
fantasize and dream now and again. I hear it's
quite healthy, like masturbation! Your site tickled
my enormous nuclear funny bone and gave me a break
from my daily grind of suppressing the entire
population of the world. Love to chat more, but
it just came over the red, white and blue flying
eagle phone that there is a village in Uganda
with only one McDonald's!! Must dash... Love -
Uncle Sam ps: No more Celiene Dion or we nuke...
(I'm sure I spelled her name wrong, but my MICROSOFT
spell-checker has never even heard of the bitch
guys suck ass
let me tell you something. the bums on the streets
of detriot alone could kick your army's asses
which i think is at its lowest amount in awhile.
second, you guys think you are so superior to
the united states of america. hahaha...you guys
know nothing about us. we have a huge laser in
space that is unknown to all other countries and
it is supposed to be fairly secret. also we have
developed guns that shoot around corners and kill
the enemy. what do you guys have. sticks and stones.
you guys can all burn in hell for all eternity
and wake up from your God damn dream you moose
fuckin ice suckin maple blowin pieces of fucking
shit. you are among the most pathetic idiots ever
known to the entire US and our military laughs
at you guys. you have no frickin army and the
rest of canada is embarrassed to know you guys.
you all suck dick. america rocks canada sucks
so get a real life "generals". id like to see
you even start to step up to this huge diss assholes.
AN AMERICA-LOVING PATRIOT OF HIS COUNTRY, brett
How ya gonna keep your Navy from running into
I really hope this is some kind of joke. Where
is Canada anyway? Isn't it that big chunk of ice
north of the U.S.? The likelihood of your pittiliass
country taking over the world is about the same
as the Canada olympic basketball team beating
the U.S. for the gold medal. In other words, you
chicks might need to reevaluate your goals a little
bit. Maybe you should just try accepting the fact
that Canada is nothing more than a Brittish territory
which has absolutely no business calling itself
a "country" in the sense of an indepent autonomous
entity. The Queen is still the Canada head of
State right? Huh!
Your friend to the south,
Hey! I'm from North Dakota and if you come stomping
threw my JEWISH backyard my baby brothers' muscles
WILL destroy your hockey loving FROG asses!!!
have visited your page and world domination, and
I just have to say, you will fail. First of all,
I'm taking over the world. Secondly, If I don't
manage to take over the world, my 2nd in command
will take over the world. And if that does not
work, then We'll just steal bombs and blow everything
up. It's really hopeless. You may have missions
statements, etc. But the one thing you are lacking,
is a charter. Just letting you know that it'll
never work. -El Generalissimo Grandissimo Mike
an American is from America
an Austrian is from Austria
a South African is from South Africa
a Russian is from Russia
a Canadian is from Canadia
and a Canadan is from Canada
If you are to be my conqueror, how come you cannot
even get your names straight?
Thoughts towards people in canada with the half
asses opinion that they are going to rule the
world.... You swine. You vulgar little maggot.
What is that tripe you call your opinions? What
is that scrofulous little tumor you call a brain?
Don't you know that you are pathetic? You worthless
bag of filth, you wad of pus. You're a canker.
A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss
a goat then be seen with you. You're a putrescent
mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little
worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt.
You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is
a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion,
a big suck on a sour lemon. I will never get over
the embarrassment of belonging to the same species
as you. You are a monster, an ogre. I barf at
the very thought of you. You have all the appeal
of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile,
worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed,
a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention,
every damn one of you smell? You are weary, stale,
flat and unprofitable. You're grimy, squalid,
nasty and profane. I have excreted better things
than you. You are foul and disgusting. You're
a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you.You
are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You
are ridiculous and obnoxious. I would rather bathe
with Hitler than speak to you. You are the moral
equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness,
a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You
are a disease. On a good day you're a half-wit.
You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all
that lends to character. You have the personality
of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are
asinine and benighted. You are the source of all
unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever
you go. You are a fiend and a coward and you have
bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved.
I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise
everything about you!
When I see canada I always think of this: http://www.adcritic.com/content/edge-102-i-am-not.html
You Canadian people are not brave enough to fight
for your own independence.... How the hell are
you going to fight us?
BRB Going out to burn the Canadian flag, cya in
The man from United States, Tennessee Ace
you suck i knew for a long time you were planning
something .you will fail and the U.S.A. will brutally
kill all of you for your stupid crap. plus the
only reason you kicked out some americans in 1812
was because you were so afraid we would take over
you nation and also because you were french.you
also have problems of your own stupid ass province
of quebec wants to leave you also fuck you canada
danm mounties don't even have guns
your damn mounties are fucking gay and canadian
bacon taste like crap
even tom green thinks america is better then canada
reading your page some of us Americans have gotten
together and decided to send the salvation army
up to take over canada! Since you have no real
army we figure the salvation army may be a bit
of an overkill but what the heck! We don't really
want your country but we do want your beer! LOL
You loving neighbor-soon to be rule ruler
Sixpack A Beer
how do you expect to win when U.S.A has battle
plans for every country in the world and not to
mention we out number 30to1 yea know pluse we
got nukes and you dont.
you go and TRY to invade when you "cross the border"
ill be waiten for u
YOU CAN GO AHEAD AND TRY TO INVADE BUT IN NORTERN
INDIANA EXPECT HEAVY RESTIANCE FROM ME INDIANA
WILL NEVER FALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this has to be the stupidest thing that I have
gone threw, I laughed so hard that I had tears
in my eyes!!!! Good joke!!!
I've always thought of the relationship between
the USA and Canada as that of two brothers: the
elder one is tall, dashingly handsome and of powerful
stature, clever, independent, fabulously wealthy
and successful, admired (or feared and deferred
to,) by the whole world, sometimes cruel and selfish,
but always seeking to be loyal to his allies and
friends. The little brother is somewhat simple,
puny, good-hearted though knock-kneed and a bit-feeble
minded, absolutely dependent upon others, at first
upon their ancient and feeble father (the UK)
and now, mostly upon his older brother, and lives
in his golden shadow. Sorry, guys, your fate of
eternal mediocrity was sealed when you failed
to take our side in the revolution against Britain
so many years ago. I guess you thought we'd lose,
eh? Whoops, major miscalculation. Well, at least
life for you is quite warm and safe in our shadow.
Sadly, the fact that you didn't take our side
against mean old Dad means that you didn't reap
the benefits of pride in freedom that we did.
Your national identity crisis (this site is one
indication, as is that beer television commercial
– what a sad, solitary forum for Canadian patriotism!)
causes you to lash out against us, your brother.
It stems from the fact that you never wrested
your independence away from anyone, indeed, have
never even particularly asserted it at all, as
a nation. For God's sakes, the Queen of England
is on your freakin' money! Are you English, British,
Canadian, French what?? Do you even know? My advice
to help alleviate your identity crisis and to
engender true national pride, as opposed to the
kind which is manufactured by your TV advertisers,
is as follows:
1. Pick ONE identity, and go with that. Quebecois,
Canadian, or British. NO, you can't be all three.
Pick one. Extirpate the other two. The world will
even have more respect for you if you declare
yourself a district of Great Britain, than the
current political muddle you've got going up there
(commonwealth?? Semi-detached Quebec??)
2. A tree-leaf is about as wussy as it gets, for
a national symbol. It says, "we like trees." Hmm.
Not exactly awe-inspiring or valiant. Focus on
these two other qualities, or maybe something
that hearkens back to your cultural heritage.
Bottom line: your flag and symbols need overhauling,
if you want to be taken seriously. The song, too.
Boresville. I suggest "You ain't seen nothin'
yet," by BTO.
3. Get that wrinkly old bitch off of your money,
ASAP. News flash: she's never done squat for you,
and never will. It's a disgrace to your nation.
I could go on, but these are a good start. You've
got your work cut out for you, but we're rooting
for you down here. No, really, little bro, we
want to see you do well. Now fetch us another
Molsen and send out that guy Carry again, he's
Your loving older brother, USA
I truly hope you are kidding. I know you realize
that a fair portion of your people are French
and they won't commit to anything especially if
it meant that they might get hurt.
Pray that we take you in silence. -An American
that we take you in silence. - An American
the page but ... If you insist on continuing with
this non-sense, we will have no choice but to
introduce rats to the virgin soil of Alberta!
all means, take over the world and make it Canadian.
Start with Quebec.
replace our constitution with yours... whenever
replace our dollar bill with that coin that pictures
a bird that dives.... Making the closest hard
currency the peso, which we'll need several trillion
of for our shopping trips across the border to
And send the national anthem back to committee
for another rewrite. Any of us who are overseas
won't notice, cuz we're already pretending to
be Canadian... (actual quote from a bartender
in Rome: "Yeah, whenever America bombs anything
suddenly a lot more Canadians start coming to
Does Canada even have an army???
I happened to see your site, and would like to
congratulate you on making the most retarded site
I've seen in a while.
Canada sux my big hairy AMERICAN dick U.S.A rules
all canadians are drunk retared bastards they
all should be killed and canadian music sux MetallicA
rules bite me i hope u die
You fool! Only I can obtian the world!............idoit
Canada sux! ill send you to the gay concentration
FILTHY CANADIAN PIGS!!!! YOUR BACKWARDS, THIRD
WORLD, MILK-IN-A-BAG NATION IS AND ALWAYS WILL
BE NOTHING MORE THAN A PARKING LOT FOR THE UNITED
STATES OF AMERICA. KNOW YOUR PLACE.
the Coolest Dude
damn canadian hosers! you all know usa is the
only country that can dominate. so shut the fuck
up, eh? go shoot some damn mooses while you drink
your canada dry ginger ale, damn hoser bitches.
up with usa! down with canada.
the coolest dude
is one of the most amusing sites I've ever been
too, unfortunately for you your plan will never
work. I site various logistical problems:
mightiest weapon, Tom Green, has lost a testicle
therefore rendering him useless. Also Drew Barrymore
has whiled him away from your beaver infested
2: Canada's real cold
In order to win a war you need to have what is
known as an "army"
To defeat you we could simply pay all the Mexican
Laborers 8 cents an hour over what they get to
pick fava beans to fight you and I'm sure they'd
be more than willing.
Your greatest export is "red green" and i'm telling
ya there's not much there.
Most importantly as soon as you invade quebec
will take the oppourtunity to ally with us and
kick your hockey playing asses back to the stone
eh that's aboot it eh, so there ya go hoser,
You guys are just doing this because youre upset
that the Nordiques and the Jets moved south of
the border, right? I mean, we took in Celine Dion
and Bryan Adams, I think that makes us about even....
I hope you 2 aren't serious. Because the new nation
of Germania will rule supream as it did in the
simulator. heheh. I find your site ammusing and
well...pointless. I am sure there is an anti-canadian
movement out there...just look around.
"a canadian is only an ameriacn without a gun"
micael moore .
You must first get past America. There you will
Horribly. Our Salvation Army could kick Canada's
ass, and we might just
send in the Boy Scouts to finish up the light
work. There are over 80
million armed citizens here, the vast majority
of which own more than
one gun. We would kick your asses, take over all
of your territory, and
the vast majority of Americans would still not
even know we were at war.
The ease with which we would dominate you would
fool most Americans into
thinking it was just an elementary school game
of tag, not a war.
you and the queen
Larry -->proud to be from the "south"
Yvonne T Allen
in Gods name do you keep sending us your unwanted
citizens-e.g. Caltech Post Doc. John Scollard?
don't know anything about Canada,but I sure wish
you guys wouldn't bash my homeland. However, I
do realize it is in satire. Are those people that
sent you the hate mail serious? Some were insulting
your intellectual abilities,yet their spelling
was atrocious! And some of them even had the nerves
to be racist! I can't believe they had the audacity
to degrade their own fellow Americans at an anti-American
site no less! You guys stop being so mean,or else
I will spread peanut butter over ya's and lick
it all off with my tongue. (hehe...) America is
groovie when it wants to be and I'm sure Canada
with love, Peace-loviing black hippie chic in
one goes out to all those delusional, socialist,
frostbitten pieces of trash who actually believe
that Canada can dominate anything let alone the
world. First of let me start by quoting the most
electrifying man in sports entertainment by saying,
IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK. You are the
biggest and I do mean biggest pieces of socialist
trash that it has eeever been by extreme displeasure
hearing of. Canada cannot even dominate Quebec
let alone the world. Let me list the reasons why:
the Montreal Expos
the heterosexually challenged Mounties
you are not American (or British which runs a
your hockey teams either suck or desire to become
Dan Akroyd is Canadian
Canada is simply a suburb of North Dakota
your chief exports are frosty precipitation, bad
maple syrup, and ridiculous accents
"aboot" is not a word, nor shall it
ever be one
your Maple Leaf flag is the most ridiculous national
symbol known to man
in conclusion let me say, that Canada will never,
eeever come close to winning another Stanley Cup
let alone dominating the world.
Your hero and role model,
Canada have an army? Instead of world domination,
and thoughts of destroying America shouldn't
you guys be grateful to us that your not speaking
German right now. If you guys insist upon this
ridiculous course of action we may allow a stronger
ally of ours to conquer you. I mean lets face
it we're the only buffer between you and Mexico.
And you're not all that far from the Bahamas.
So tread lightly and carry a tank division or
regret that I have but one life to give to my
a joke - right???
has always been passive and safe - stay that way
- or expect the worse