2. Use space station to electronically destroy the entire world's communication systems, with the exception of the CBC, CTV, Newsworld, YTV, CanWest Global, CityTV, MuchMusic, TVO, BBC Four, and Fox on Sundays at nine o'clock.

3. Broadcast own political agenda and propaganda on new worldwide station -- Can-O-Vision.

4. Broadcast "Heritage Moments" and "Hinterland" spots every 15 minutes.

5. Invite Peter Mansbridge to execute the turncoat traitor Peter Jennings. Show execution on live tv.

6. Kill the VJs and crew of MTV and feed their corpses to the VJs and crew of MuchMusic.

7. At the end of every broadcast day, force viewers to watch a montage of patriotic video images, as selected by the Generals and including several tyrannical subliminal messages of sublimation to Canadian World Domination. Failure to watch will result in electric shockage from the Ever-Vigilant & Omnipotent (EVO) space station "Bombardier1".

Next: Part 2!

TOP