Our fierce and determined, mumbly and wrinkly, Prime Minister has happily joined the campaign for Canadian World Domination and performs his role as advisor with great skill. He has already excelled in the areas of Terror and Destruction, and quite brilliantly turned the February 15th 1996 Flag Day celebration into a joyous opportunity for blood-shed and agony as he patriotically assaulted a dastardly nay-sayer, turning the lesson in brutality into a grim prophecy of Canadian domination to come. The message was clear: Non-Canadians must fear the coming invasion of Righteous Patriots.

Recorded below is a transcript of our faithful Prime Minister Jean Chretien's words to the nation immediately following the February 15th Flag Day assault. Note the chilling clarity of his threat to the world. Note his single-minded pursuit of the eradication of all obstacles in our Path of Domination. His words are an inspiration to all good and loyal Canadian patriots. Presented here in poem format, so as to encapsulate the heroic feeling of Canadian strength, this statement has been distributed to Canuck soldiers on the front lines and is heartily endorsed by your ever kindly, yet so soundly merciless, Generals.

[Canadian propaganda specialists load up boxes of the Prime Minister's comments to send to loyal Canadian troops on the front lines. Spare pamphlets will be distributed over enemy territory so as to strike further fear into the hearts of the un-Canadian. Note the use of the Generals' private jet: "Gordie1"]

A Prime Minister's Comments:

"I don't know.



What happened?



If you don't know,



the cameras were there.



Some people came in my way,



it might have been...



I had to go,



so if you are in my way,



I am walking.



So I don't know what happened.



Something happened



to somebody



who should not have been there."

TOP