- we've left! No more pop-up windows, sneaky floating
images, or polite reminders of the value of a "Geocities
guide" at the top of your page. Canadian World Domination
pages are no longer affiliated with Geocities.
Finally, everyone can stop complaining about the fucking
pop-up windows. Alright - are you happy? The pop-up windows
are gone. They no longer plague you. That's right, they're
gone. You may be staring suspiciously at the screen -
expecting to have to click one away, but FEAR NOT, they
are gone for good.
Now you can get back to complaining about how we don't
have an 'O' Canada' MIDI on the index page...
Buddy Doesn't Like Our Anti-Geocitism!
Here's a note our staff received recently:
I was mildly interested in the concept of your web
site until I was distracted by your ranting about
how awful Geocities was/is. Excuse me, but last time
I heard, Geocities provided FREE web sites. So do
lots of other places. If you've got something worth
my bandwidth to say, then say it, but don't waste
my time complaining about a FREE service that you
still weren't happy with. If you couldn't pursue any
of the several options at Geocities to be free of
pop-ups, than I have decided that you're too lazy
and or too stupid for me to be listening to.
Content and grateful Geo Plus member (no stigma here),
That's Right! The Generals Did Reply, And Much Wrath Was
(In A Kind And Loving Fashion)
We were only mildly interested in reading your email
until you started to get all schmaltzy over Geocities
- at this point, the lilt of your prose and the charming
nature of your communiqué had sucked us in
and we were completely fascinated.
Regarding your obvious affection for Geocities, we
were disappointed to find that you did not go all
the way and refer to us as "dumb fucking losers"
instead of "stupid" which is relatively
tame compared to your passion for The Big G!
Although we do not wish to have a different opinion
than an honourable GeoPlus member (we are into conformity
and collectivism, naturally) we fear you might be
misinformed about the true character of the "Geocities
Community". We *could* call you 'too lazy and/or
too stupid' to learn about your own web host - but
that would be really rude.
Puddin', if we were going to PAY to host our web page
we'd sure as Hell find a host that has reliable service
and *doesn't* require a link to Big Brother Geocities
on every page...
So, our relationship with the Geocities machine soured,
we left. And happily. After talking to other Geocities
refugees we discovered that we had it easy!
Geocities is in the habit of haphazardly censoring
member pages for the most spurious of reasons. (These
can range from everything from mistaken identity [oh,
this page about tropical birds *doesn't* have any
naked girls on it? Sorry, it's been censored anyway,
we had a complaint] to concerns about Geocities services.
That's right...a veteran Geocities member who writes
"I don't really like the new Geocities watermark"
can find his page automatically suspended....simple
opinions aren't allowed in the happy-happy world of
the Geocities cyber reich).
Well then - "leave Geocities" you say -
Okay! Let's try that....Uh oh...
To blacken the Geocities name even further - the Geocities
Machine actively pursues the destruction of sites
that criticize the company - even if they are hosted
by non-Geocities servers! Threatening legal action,
Geocities screams at web hosts and ISPs until they
take the offending page down (or take a stand against
the nonsense). This is *well-documented*, as Geocities
has tried to censor everything from parodies, to anti-Geocities
rants, to unflattering Geocities articles in e-zines.
Remember: none of this stuff is even ON the Geocities
server and much of it is legitimate criticism of a
corporate entity that behaves as though it should
control every thought concerning the "Geocities
That is pretty uncool.
(We're talking Scientologist-calibre litigious paranoia
We're the only Tyrants of the New World Order! Down
So - that's why we were not happy with this "FREE
Don't believe our word? Check out these sites:
(Please read this one carefully - it has a lot of
info about the unsightly practices of the Geocities
(a very funny, spot-on parody)
(including the "why we can't admit we fucked
Please read actually visit the sites above before
you flame us back - the Generals find it difficult
to carry on an argument with people who are so obviously
in the wrong when they are so obviously (and magnificently)
in the right. Mmmm...love that smell of righteous
Okay honey, go now and be at peace.
Love and hugs!
A Bit of Interactivity, Don't Ever Say CWD Isn't 'With
Do we have any broken links? Are any of our images missing?
Do we have a spelling error? Do you disagree with our
position on international economic development? As we
encourage free expression of a Canadian World Domination-related
manner, we ask that you TELL US all about our web page
foibles so we can get right to punishing the techno-drone
responsible for the mistake...
And because your Generals care deeply about you all and
only want to see you happy, here's handy links to
curling and some porn.
Content copyright © 1997-2000 Generals Claire
& Jenny, Canadian World Domination.
Unauthorized duplication leads to punishment.