sweeties, it was last year!
But in the great glory that is CWD,
each and every day glows,
with the glowy, glowingness of a Canada Day!
of fervour and good intentions, CWD staff have exhausted
their creative capacities and have painstakingly devised
a new logo for the CWD web site and uniform breast pockets
of patriotic Canadian dominators of the future. The logo
is, as you must notice, somewhat swirly, this swirling
action being intended to symbolize the relentless action
of Canadian World Domination schemes. Although several
designs were commissioned, this image spoke to Generals
Claire and Jenny. Both Generals were much impressed by
the bold lettering and particularly by the aforementioned
swirling action. True to Canadian form, the logo is unpretenious,
stylish yet subdued, seemingly harmless but with pokey
bits and sharp edges, aware of its inherent coolness yet
without an insufferable "rippling flag" gif
which we are all very sick of thank you very much!
We were unable to incorporate the beaver Gordie, our mascot,
in the new logo, but will soon be revamping the CWD site
to include his charming self. As if it didn't take ages
to download our stuff already. Ah well, patience is a
virtue known to Canadians.
because it is the aftermath of Canada Day, we felt obligated
to expand our "obligatory links" section to
include some places to go if you are the type of individual
to spend a holiday like Canada Day on your computer instead
of doing something actually useful like writing grafitti
on the walls of the new American embassy being built across
from Parliament Hill (at last check, "US out of Canada
- now!" has yet to be painted over). As a quick aside,
if any of you attended the July 1st celebrations on Parliament
Hill, you might have seen General Claire in the crowd...
was engaged in deeds of great and secret import.
Generals are usually wary of "links" sections
- they only being an exit off our excellent site into
someone else's crappier one - but have relented in most
typical gentle fashion, knowing that some of our followers
are unable to use search engines and might never find
other Canadian sites - having only stumbled on to this
one in the first place after a series of incredibly lucky
stabs at the keyboard. That only proves that God is on
our side. And all the other deities too. CWD is blessed.
Very much so.
here's a rum idea, why don't you explore the rest of our
site and then come back and try these later? Of course,
if you want to leave now, screw you. We didn't mean that
really - it's the pressure of the obligatory links. We
hate obligatory links...
Foundation's Heritage Minutes
- Canada Day
you been sent this in email yet? No? You loser. Here's
the king of the university mailing list - it's the infamous
Onion parody: Perky
Canada Has Own Government, Laws Now that you notice
we have this listed as an obligatory link you can stop
sending the URL to us in email. Yes, we like it, we've
read it. All have read it.
from your Generals: If you are going to send us the "real"
radio broadcast of the American battleship and the Canadian
lighthouse, please don't. Yes, we've read that one too.
It's funny - fake, but funny.
NOTE: Darlings, also stop sending us the joke with the
punchline: "wait until you see the neighbours I'm
going to give them". We've read it. Yes, it's funny.
Overcirculated, but funny.
stop sending these. Merci.
you wondering what the Generals and CWD staff did on Canada
Day 1998? Besides the Parliament Hill celebrations, they
exerted diplomatic pressure on world leaders, engineered
several corporate mergers, developed a hydrodynamic solution
for the problem of prairie brush fires, developed a pyrodynamic
solution for the problem of flooding, and oversaw several
other CWD-oriented activities. Fortunately the Generals
have a personal staff of several thousand, allowing them
much free time in which to sign documents blindly and
try to remember the lyrics to Lisa Lougheed's terrific
credits theme song for CBC's "The Raccoons".
It's got something about 'running with us' - but to run
where? And why? Fine questions deserving of in-depth analysis.
Content copyright © 1997-2000 Generals Claire
& Jenny, Canadian World Domination.
Unauthorized duplication leads to punishment.